Saltar para: Posts [1], Pesquisa e Arquivos [2]


12
Mai17

2017-05-12

by M

what is this world we live in in which i like harry style's album better than ed sheeran's

Autoria e outros dados (tags, etc)

02
Mai17

about riding

by M

This is par of a post written on my horseblr but I thought I would put it here too. Mainly because I want some horses in here. Partially because I want to post more often.

 

If you told me six months ago I would be where I am (in terms of riding) right now I wouldn’t even listened, let alone believed. If I had known then that all it took was consistent, daily work all along…! If I could’ve imagined the wonders of patience and calmness and serenity and what those can do for my horse. I would’ve gone very much further.

 

I know that I owe 99% of what I know and where I am to my previous & first trainer; you can’t ignore the power of 8-year-old relationships. I still wonder what he would say in certain situations, I follow his advice in my head and I wish he could see how far me and Pucci have came. But part of me can’t help but resent that all this time his laziness and lack of drive were impairing our progress, that his anger outbursts had me questioning everything, that he failed to recognise my effort and dedication time and time over.

 

But I do have to thank him one last time. Because when he left he set us a free in a way; he forced me to prioritise horses over everything else, one last time; he sent me back home and for one last time: I fell head over heals for this crazy lifestyle which now runs through my veins and this a deeply engraved part of me.

 

I’m really starting to think it’s for life.

 

Autoria e outros dados (tags, etc)

tags:

29
Abr17

absence as per usual

by M

i can't believe it's been a month since i last posted, especially after vowing to try and write every single day. to be fair i have been writing oftenish in other places scattered through life, but it never ends up being here for some reason.

 

i think mostly because all that i feel like writing about is london because it's been on my mind 24/7, but i still haven't managed to collect my thoughts and put them into words. which is funny because generally i collect my thoughts by putting them into words, you see and this time around it's such a whirlwind of thoughts, feelings, worries, emotions that i can't quite grasp them myself let alone express them.

 

i am trying, trust me. i've tried sitting down with the sole purpose of spilling it all out but i don't even know where to begin; i think because in a way it traces so far back that it's nearly impossible to pinpoint. maybe i'll end up writing 10k words about how every minute has led to this although that would probably turn into a whole dissertation about coincidence and energy and the universe and god. to be fair i don't really know if it's even possible to pull them apart - chance and me moving to london.

 

this reminds me of that one time alice and i wrote a song in class back in 9th grade. maybe i'll write about that one.

Autoria e outros dados (tags, etc)

25
Mar17

metaphors

by M

you know that feeling when you're about to jump into the pool because the water is just a bit too cold for you to walk in through the stairs and so you just stand there, at the edge of the pool, you countdown a million times but you just can't bring yourself to leap and it's like your stomach turns into a balloon each time you say 3

that's what life feels like right now.

Autoria e outros dados (tags, etc)

21
Mar17

words

by M

sometimes it feels like words are not enough. not in terms of quantity or weight.. they're not tridimensional enough to fulfill my creative needs. but i can't draw, there's nothing here to photograph properly and my life isn't cool enough to be filmmed so i don't know what to do.

 

today is one of those days.

Autoria e outros dados (tags, etc)

16
Mar17

2017-03-16

by M

the current friday night situation is chatting about drugs, politics and religion with a bunch of strangers on a goldsmiths media freshers facebook group.

i swear my life has been reaching all time highs in terms of what the fuckness

Autoria e outros dados (tags, etc)

15
Mar17

by M

sub-buzz-16362-1484351764-2.png

 ain't got much to say, so i thought i would leave this here to brighten up your day :)

Autoria e outros dados (tags, etc)

tags:

08
Mar17

by M

found my old polyvore account today and the bio is "I always fall for fictional characters" story of my life???

Autoria e outros dados (tags, etc)

03
Mar17

amen

by M

life is more than fitting in your jeans. it's love, understanding, positivity.

Autoria e outros dados (tags, etc)

tags:

20
Fev17

by M

Moving to London might be the no. 1 goal on my 2017 list and while my mind is often planning and daydreaming (and even worrying a little), I have been trying my hardest to appreciate the privilege of studying and living in Lisbon as best as I can. It helps that the weather has been LAesque and my dear sistemics teacher has decided to miss class twice. But nothing can compare to mornings spent in Starbucks, sunsets by the river or afternoon's like today's - in which we left uni at 2pm to go buy (veggie) hot dogs and ate them at the park, no coats, just sunshades and the grass and there we stayed for 2h. When we left the shadow still hadn't reached our spot and the breeze was not enough to puts us off, so I walked home and 7 minutes later here I was.

IMG_9159.JPG

Thinking about rainy days and cheap coffee and handkerchief-sized dorm rooms is a bit uninspiring right now, but that's why I know it'll be worth it. Because when it's so easy to stay, so legitimate, so appealing in a sense, I still want to go. I still want so very much to go, even though it's hard and dautning and even a little sad. If I'm willing to give up this city and these friendships which are only now starting to bloom, to start over in an unfamiliar darker city, then I must really want to do it. And none of these ever hinders my excitement.

And a lot of people tell me that I won't come back, that I'll be sorta trapped in a country less welcoming but more open -- to opportunity, to education, to success even. I can't know right now if this is true and to be honest I don't even dare pondering on it; when tomorrow's uncertain as it is, I can't bring myself to think much further. But if that's the case, at least I'll have Lisbon to call home -- that alone is a blessing.

Autoria e outros dados (tags, etc)