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21
Mai17

about this era

by M

I feel like sims stopped looking like humans, but humans started to look like sims

roxi 1.png

 

bun 1.png

 

nikkie 1.png

...and I'm not sure how I feel about it.

 

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16
Mai17

weekend snippets

by M

i have an above-average ability to be myself & i think that weekend really proved it it.

 

on friday i stayed home until sunset and then went to the supermarket to buy ingredients for soup. then i made soup and watched a film after dinner.

  

on saturday i had breakfast and lunch at one of my favorite cafés, tartine, and also finished most of my notes for uni. i shopped for awhile before coming back home, just before the city went bananas with the football finals. i made myself a chocolate mugcake and stayed up late watching the eurovision results, making the video and overall falling for amar pelos dois, which i didn't expect to. it never felt lonely because i was texting my sister, whatsapping with Lara and Q and speaking to London people on facebook.

 

sunday saw a late start and a lot of lazying. i spent too much time on whatsapp gossiping and eventually had to go to leave the house if i wanted to get any work done. i went to fábrica, which is also one of my favorite cafés in town and i knew it doesn't have wifi which helped through 7 pages of the worst text ever. it got so boring i felt compelled to order carrot cake and then walked back home. 

 

and eventually mariana got home and the weekend was over. here are some snippets:

 

 

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14
Mai17

just a thought

by M

is it weird that I'm already planning what to give people on xmas?

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  • the fact that he doesn't give a fuck
  • mainly the fact that he doesn't give a fuck
  • the fact that the only little fucks he gives are about music
  • his voice
  • the way he goes from speaking to singing so casually
  • effortlessness
  • he sounds straight out of a disney soundtrack

 

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12
Mai17

2017-05-12

by M

what is this world we live in in which i like harry style's album better than ed sheeran's

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02
Mai17

about riding

by M

This is par of a post written on my horseblr but I thought I would put it here too. Mainly because I want some horses in here. Partially because I want to post more often.

 

If you told me six months ago I would be where I am (in terms of riding) right now I wouldn’t even listened, let alone believed. If I had known then that all it took was consistent, daily work all along…! If I could’ve imagined the wonders of patience and calmness and serenity and what those can do for my horse. I would’ve gone very much further.

 

I know that I owe 99% of what I know and where I am to my previous & first trainer; you can’t ignore the power of 8-year-old relationships. I still wonder what he would say in certain situations, I follow his advice in my head and I wish he could see how far me and Pucci have came. But part of me can’t help but resent that all this time his laziness and lack of drive were impairing our progress, that his anger outbursts had me questioning everything, that he failed to recognise my effort and dedication time and time over.

 

But I do have to thank him one last time. Because when he left he set us a free in a way; he forced me to prioritise horses over everything else, one last time; he sent me back home and for one last time: I fell head over heals for this crazy lifestyle which now runs through my veins and this a deeply engraved part of me.

 

I’m really starting to think it’s for life.

 

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tags:

29
Abr17

absence as per usual

by M

i can't believe it's been a month since i last posted, especially after vowing to try and write every single day. to be fair i have been writing oftenish in other places scattered through life, but it never ends up being here for some reason.

 

i think mostly because all that i feel like writing about is london because it's been on my mind 24/7, but i still haven't managed to collect my thoughts and put them into words. which is funny because generally i collect my thoughts by putting them into words, you see and this time around it's such a whirlwind of thoughts, feelings, worries, emotions that i can't quite grasp them myself let alone express them.

 

i am trying, trust me. i've tried sitting down with the sole purpose of spilling it all out but i don't even know where to begin; i think because in a way it traces so far back that it's nearly impossible to pinpoint. maybe i'll end up writing 10k words about how every minute has led to this although that would probably turn into a whole dissertation about coincidence and energy and the universe and god. to be fair i don't really know if it's even possible to pull them apart - chance and me moving to london.

 

this reminds me of that one time alice and i wrote a song in class back in 9th grade. maybe i'll write about that one.

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25
Mar17

metaphors

by M

you know that feeling when you're about to jump into the pool because the water is just a bit too cold for you to walk in through the stairs and so you just stand there, at the edge of the pool, you countdown a million times but you just can't bring yourself to leap and it's like your stomach turns into a balloon each time you say 3

that's what life feels like right now.

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21
Mar17

words

by M

sometimes it feels like words are not enough. not in terms of quantity or weight.. they're not tridimensional enough to fulfill my creative needs. but i can't draw, there's nothing here to photograph properly and my life isn't cool enough to be filmmed so i don't know what to do.

 

today is one of those days.

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16
Mar17

2017-03-16

by M

the current friday night situation is chatting about drugs, politics and religion with a bunch of strangers on a goldsmiths media freshers facebook group.

i swear my life has been reaching all time highs in terms of what the fuckness

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